Oh Crap

The day began with Jonathan's usual attempts to control. But, nothing out of the ordinary. Dad happened to be home, which added to Jonathan's confusion a bit. Daddy had a headache and had decided to sleep a little more. Jonathan thought he should get away with a bit more. Much to his dismay, Mom was showing Dad how she handles mornings.

Mom takes Jonathan to school and has a few more minutes with Dad before she goes to the local coffee shop to meet up with some ladies from the church. WOW!! The first outing of this sort in at least a year!! We spent 2 hours visiting! Wonderful!!

Jonathan is picked up from school and taken to Walmart with Mom to buy a few needed items. We seem to think that Mom needs us to point out what she needs to buy. Mom doesn't need this help. By this time Mom was tired and almost done and just asked him if she needed his help. He was pointing to the ravioli so she got the spaghettios. On to the check-out line. Gotta give the kid credit, he did ask if he could help put things on the conveyor belt. I said, "no," at this point, I just wanted his hands to stay on the cart.

We get to the car and home and unload and put the cold things away. I told him where to put the other things. I pulled leftovers out of the fridge for lunch. Oh no!!! A storm is brewing - big time!!! I ask the brewer what is wrong. He wants spaghettios. I let him know I had other plans, we have leftovers that we need to use up. The storm continues to brew as I am preparing plates to heat in the microwave. I "LOVINGLY" pulled lots of sauces out of the fridge to put onto the fondue leftovers from my trip to a restaurant with a friend of mine. I put the plates on the counter and put a nice display of sauces on each one. His attitude improved a bit with this. I made sure to make a big deal of it.

We ate and he liked everything and asked for more. I told him that all that was left was chicken. The one he was throwing such a fit about at the begining. He asked if he could have the sauces. I said he could. I heated up the last of the chicken. I ate a bit of it and gave him a bunch. HMMM - he liked it this time.

So - on to homeschooling. He already knew there was going to be something fun at the end. I made sure that information was out so he would want to get there. We plugged along pretty well for a bit until he had to stand up and learn how to act if he were in a spelling bee. Now I had already been hit, scratched, kicked under the table, shouted at and ignored. He had done things any old way he pleased. So to do a spelling bee, you must speak clearly - mumble, mumble, mumble. Well, two attempts at that and I sent him on down to his room.

While he was down there, I decided it was too late to do anymore school. He had woken me up at 5 am to go to the bathroom and owed me chores. After all, I am just to tired to do my work on so little sleep. The motion detector outside his door alarms in our bedroom with a really long and loud buzz.

I started dinner and gave him a broom to sweep the dining room. He kept saying it smelled like poop in there. I ignored him and kept cooking. I checked his work a few times and noted unswept areas. After awhile I went around the whole room, I commented at the far end, "it does smell like poop in here" and went back to the kitchen to check on the food. The dining room finally looked good and he moved on to the school area floor. I went over there to check it after awhile and he farted while I was over there. I said, "that must have been the problem in the dining room." Then I went back to the kitchen. This poor boy was probably either madder than all get out by this time or thought he had the stupidest mom.

Hubby came home and we got dinner finished up while Jonathan swept the kitchen floor. We ate dinner and told him to take a shower. I had had a busy day and wanted to relax for a bit. I sat in my recliner with my laptop and got onto ATN. Hubby worked on cleaning dinner up. Jonathan headed to the bathroom. He was asking for shampoo. His last bottle had an amber colored liquid in it. I made him dump it and throw the bottle out. My hubby had already been filling it with water, a tad of soap and a tad of food coloring since the whole thing gets dumped out each shampooing anyway.

Randy went down to give Jonathan his shampoo. He came out and whispered to me that Jonathan had pooped into the register. Now, I think this is hilarious!! He was furious with me all afternoon because things weren't going his way. He was trying to indimidate me all afternoon and it didn't work. I heard, "you'd better ----" type statements, puffing his body up, shouting at me. I was strong enough for all of it. He couldn't get me to back down and he couldn't get me mad. So, one last try - poop in the register. BUT - Mom had NO clue he did it, DAD found out!!!!

So, Dad got a bucket of water with simple green in it and rags. He took it to the bathroom and left it in there. Then he came out and told me that he thinks he is going to assume the poop is in the toilet first. So, he'll have to clean the toilet, tub and sink. By this time, Jonathan has been in the shower a long time. Randy turns the hot water off. Jonathan comes back out, "we're OUT of water AGAIN!!" Sympathetic parents say - "wow, Jonathan, you sure are having a hard time with that!" He turns around to go back to the bathroom and we see beat red buns.

Randy follows him and tells him there must me poop in the toilet that needs to be cleaned up. He hands him the tools to clean with. I am relating this to a friend on yahoo messenger as I hear Jonathan stomping and storming. He is shouting about where the poop really is. Randy says, "oh Jonathan, you gave that up a long time ago. You wouldn't do that anymore." Jonathan says, "yes I do, I still do that." Then I call out, "you mean, we can't uncover the vent in your room? We were about to do that because we thought you were done pooping and peeing in it. Wow! Don't know what we are going to do know?" Jonathan is doing a word dance in the bathroom. Got the kid thinking!

So, first job - clean the toilet. Still smells like poop. Dad - I told you why - I pooped in the register. Next - clean the tub. Now - clean the sink. The whole time, Jonathan is fuming about not having water to clean the bathroom. Remember, he ran it out of water. What really happens is that when the hot was turned off it makes the cold go to a drizzle in the tub. But the sink and toilet are fine. So, Jonathan did have water, it was just scarce in the tub.

So, Jonathan comes out and says the bathroom doesn't stink anymore. Randy said, It sure doesn't smell like a bed of roses." This sent both of us over the edge. Jonathan hates to be laughed at but when he heard us laughing on this one he actually started smiling and kinda chuckling. I was in tears and Randy was complaining about his stomach hurting. Then we hear noises going on in the bathroom. Pretty quick Jonathan comes out with a bucket and takes it to Randy. He says, "see, there was poop in there." Poor Daddy, he just says, "Jonathan, I don't want to see your poop. Where does it belong?" To which, Jonathan replies, "the toilet" and off he goes to dump it.

My lands this kid is funny. He has been running around naked this whole time, with comet streaks on him. Back and forth, fighting the process.Complaining about being tired. Daddy goes down to check on the job and informs him that the register still hasn't been cleaned well enough. More shouting at Daddy.

When the clean-up is complete, Jonathan needs to rinse the comet and whatever else is on his body off. He was convinced we were still out of water. Daddy informed him that it should have had time to build back up by them. So he got in the tub and was able to rinse off and get clean PJ's on to settle down for bed.

I had planned to put Jonathan to bed early tonight. He looks and acts tired. But, you know crap can't wait. And, it wasn't mine and my husband wasn't home all day and I really don't believe we have ghosts in the house. SO, that left one little boy. He doesn't have his sister to blame anymore - but he has tried a few times. So, Jonathan finally got to bed and I went to take a bath in a nice, clean bathroom - AAAHHHHHH.

You know something - no wonder Jonathan is tired. I'd be tired too, if I spent as much energy as he does trying to take this much control and having to deal with the consequences that come from that. What an exhausting way to live!